The Solution Begins with the Family

I love the opportunity to sing and speak in Catholic elementary schools. It's so encouraging to see students that are so excited and passionate about their faith!

Typically when I speak to this age group I deliver three challenges, preceded by me asking, "who wants to freak their parents out?!".

The way I suggest they accomplish this is that when they go home from school to ask their parents if they can do three things:

1. Ask if they can pray together as a family before bed.
2. Ask if they can read a passage from the Bible at dinner.
3. Ask of they can go to Mass five minutes early on Sunday.

Actually, the five minutes early part isn't what is important... It's the "going" that I'm really trying to encourage.

However, last week I ran into a boy who told me some saddening news after the fact. He said he asked his parents all three of these and his parents responded with:

1. We can't pray together as a family before bed because: we go to bed at different times.
2. We can't read a passage from the Bible because: we don't own one.
3. We can't go to Mass because: we have sports on Sunday mornings.

Wow. Not even an attempt to try. They seemed to really miss the boat. I felt so bad for this child who was honestly trying to engage his family in faith, but his parents deliberately avoided it at all cost.

The disconnect between our generation and faith is not entirely the fault of the church facility, and it's not the fault of the school system. It's a breakdown in the family.

I'm sure many will be offended by this hard truth. The fault largely rests with the parents. And quite honestly, the parents aren't fully to blame either, because their parents formed them in a way that diminishes the importance of faith.

I can be just as guilty of this in various different ways in the context of my own family and relationships. Every time we skip Mass to pursue hockey, we tell our kids where our priorities lie. Every time we neglect Scripture, yet watch hours of television we tell our kids what we value in life. Every time we seek happiness in material things rather than finding our fulfillment in Christ we teach our kids what is important in life. This is a false hope which provides instant gratification, but is headed for long term misery.

The unfortunate reality is that OUR choices demonstrate to the next generation what we value. Many parents hold on to a convenient (and lazy) excuse of "I want my kids to decide for themselves, if they want church when they're older". Their kids like hockey because the parents like hockey. The kids eat the local cuisine of food if the parents serve it, etc. If you raise a child apart from the faith, statistics show that only a small percentage will actually ever choose to engage in the faith when they're older. Comparatively, I've seen statistics proposed that upwards of 80% of churchgoers made a commitment to Christ prior to age 18.

So what does this mean? By prioritizing sports, academics, social, media etc., above faith and religious practice, we are sabotaging young people's ability to be able to encounter something eternal. We discipline our kids, ensuring they brush their teeth, eat vegetables, study, etc. So why would faith, something immensely more important, be any different?

Please keep that boy and his family in your prayers. My wife brought Christ to her entire family at the age of seven. I believe Grace is powerful enough to pierce through this family, by means of this child too.